The first week......wait, have two weeks past?

Let the message that comes from Christ, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom He gives. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts.

- Colossians 3:16

Wow! What a start. I'm starting out this blog not wanting to write out everything that has happenned because it would take me a good couple of nights to write it all out, so I'll try and keep it short (HA!!!). I guess I could just say God is good and it would pretty much cover it, but I'll keep writing.

Let me start by saying, the more I get involved in this job, the more I wonder if I was the right person. I say that not just because I secretly doubt my own abilities (while putting on the "I know what I'm doing" face), but also because I am just gob smacked at the amount of oppurtunities that have been thrown our way.

The iLead conference. This was all the students and leaders.

Last weekend the Outdoor Education crew and the Legacy Fellowship (The Fellows, as we are now fondly known as), went to West Virginia on a trip to lead an iLead conference. It was set up by the West Virginian Education board for us to come in and help prepare identified 8th grade leaders to prepare for college. There's a really cool picture of us on the website at http://skyranchschools.com/i-LEAD.htm.

This was my team...the Maroon team.

"Maroon Maroon Maroon. OI, OI, OI!!!!"

This trip was a huge challenge for me personally and spiritually. I was going on a trip to a new state with a bunch of people I had only met a week ago, and I have to admit the idea of getting thrown into a team leader position straight off the bat was daunting. I was definately stripped of a lot of pride on this trip, learned what it meant to be humble, and how acting like a big fool is sometimes the quickest way to get to know someone!

Zack was our flag bearer....and the best iLead Idol singer there.....regardless of the judges' decision!

Spiritually, it was a trip that stretched me. We were basically invited to hang out with a lot of kids that don't know God, or that have probably never pondered the concept of who God is, and were told that we were not to mention His name to them at all. We were only there to help lead them to college, even though our hearts wanted to lead them to Christ. I went through the whole thought process of disagreeing with the program; thinking that it musn't be Christ centered. I ended up judging a whole bunch of people based on the fact our purpose was to only teach about college, while claiming to be Christians that are supposed to 'make disciples of all nations'.

Nathan and Zack.....or the other way around ;)

Well.....just reminded me again of how imperfect I am. I was so overwhelmed by the heart of everyone I worked with. They are all so silently committed and focused on sharing their faith without making a big deal of it. It was so humbling to me: that wanted to declare loudly my love for Christ to these kids and make a name for myself, while watching the other team leaders still themselves and diligently pour out God's love onto these students.

It was also fun to stay up till 3am with them, playing "Potty on your Neighbour", and dealing out silly consequences like singing to two lonely guys in the hotel bar, with an audience of heckling co-workers. I got to know the outdoor education team so much better on this trip, as well as grow in spiritual maturity.

Lane Davis, Brooke Barbie, Mike Maguire and me. Our lasts names have all changed to "Fellows"

Now I want to talk about some incredible people. The three other people I will be working with for the entire year, as part of the Legacy Fellowship program are none other than Mike Maguire, Lane Davis and Brooke Barbie. You may not have heard of them, but you will one day. They'll probably be discipling your kids or being your boss or something like that. They are three of the most God-fearing, creative, compassionate and dedicated people I have met, and I get to work with them for a whole year!! I'm rooming with Mike and Lane, with Brooke across the hall. We've only been working together for a week and we miss the times that we are apart. I am excited when I think about them and the possibilities of us doing incredible things this year.

Jill and Clinton Pfalser.....A.K.A. Mama and Pappa Fellows

Our AMAZING leaders, Clinton and Jill Pfalser have been friends of mine for a while, but I am just so flabergasted at their willingness to invest so much in us. They are taking so much time out of their lives to feed us with oppurtunities, resources and the occaisional steaks on a Wednesday night. I have been so blessed to have them in my life, but am just so excited to see them lead us forward in this program.

The whole group with Dave Schlener and family

We are also being lead by a guy named Dave Schlener, who is a leadership guru from West Point and an international pilot with American Airlines. I cannot express how just his presence in the room brings excitement with a sense of peace. This guy is so knowledgable, yet so compassionate. So focused and determined that we are the four most important people in his life (other than his family). He is so biblical in his approach to everything it's impressive and enlightening at the same time. He has set up trips for us to take leadership seminars at West Point, as well as spend face time with American Airline system directors, university presidents, pastors, school superintendants, mayors even U.S. Congressmen in Washington D.C.!!! Not only will we meet them, but they will run us through their job for a day: let us sit in board meetings, help influence major decisions they make on a daily basis. What an incredible oppurtunities, and what a fantastic mentor to be led by. Oh did I mention we are going to Kenya for a month in August? Short side note.....

Brooke and Mike

I could go on and on about the rest of the stuff that I'm doing, but I could probably put anyone to sleep with more descriptions. So just for a break in the madness, here's some good Texas slang for those who don't know.
Make sure you read them with a strong East Texas, hick, country accent. I just learned these today. Courtesy of my roomie, Lane Davis:

"It's hotter than two mice making love in a wool sock on a hot day, Y'all"

Well, it's kinda been cold this week, so here's some good ones:

"It's colder than a witch's titty in a brass bra doing pushups in the snow!"
"It's colder than a plumber's butt wearing iron underwear!"

The guy on the right is responsible for the quotes....did I mention he wears turquoise boots?

Sorry if they sound mildly vulgar, but when Lane says them with that cowboy accent, you can hardly tell what he's saying anyway!

God is so good. We read through Genesis 1 this morning with the OE teachers, and just discussed the marvels of the Bibles first chapter. Mike brought up the point that God created humans last in the order of things, which he said, is not only humbling but also puts a lot of responsibility on our shoulders. It reveals so much of God's heart that He puts the last first, the runt of the litter as the leader, and believes that anyone can achieve anything.

I have struggled this week between balancing humility with confident leadership. I have struggled with boldly displaying my personality while remaining still enough to meet others where they are at. I have struggled with the fact that I am not good enough for this job, but that God thinks I am.

Who am I to be formed by a Creator that allows me to experience doubt and guilt and shame and humility and unworthiness, yet be loved in a way that tells me to feel loved and not oppressed. Who am I to dwell on my own faults while a Savior allows me to move mountains with my own hands.

I can't express the wonderment and awe that I feel right now at the amazing, intracate details of God's plan. That He had a well ordered, focused and diligent plan in the creation of the heavens and the earth, but that also has the same dedication in his plan for my life.

I love where I am right now..........so far from perfect.....yet so close to finding out who I am....knowing that I will always be searching for him (me).......and Him.

~Bless this week Lord....I love you with all my heart.....in good and bad times.....please be with my family, I have no idea where they are or what's going on with them. Allow me the privelidge of talking with them this week. I miss them terribly. Bless our Fellowship and my friends around the world. Thank you for Your Son and what He's done for all of them. I love you Lord.~